Sunday, February 13, 2011

Out of ten million sperm...why you?

How long have you been relying on your personality for birth control?

If you can't swim stay out of the gene pool.

(*Sign above a urinal in the Men's room.) What are you looking at? The joke is in your hand.

(*For use with a girl.) If you had no feet would you wear socks? No? Then why do you wear a bra?

You smell so bad you make Right Guard turn left; you make Secret obvious; you make Speed Stick slow down; and you get Sure confused. 

You're about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat's ass.

Who am I calling stupid? I don't know. What's your name?

When you get run over by a car it shouldn't be listed under 'accidents.'

When God was throwing intelligence down to the Earth you were holding an umbrella.

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