You're as worthless as tits on a nun.
I've upped my standards, now UP yours!
When you looked up your family tree your family was still living in it.
Your mom is so ugly that your dad takes her to work with him just so he won't have to kiss her goodbye.
You're so old you get the same sensation from a rocking chair you once got from a roller coaster.
He's so poor he can't even pay attention.
He could raise the IQ of two states if he ever moves...Georgia by leaving and Alabama by moving there.
He's on the bottom of my list of people not to run over if I see them on the street.
With her smell she could knock a buzzard off a compost heap.
An acorn doesn't fall very far from the tree so you know that entire family is nuts.